The Pleasure Gap: American Women and the Unfinished Sexual Revolution by Katherine Rowland I'm currently reading The Pleasure Gap and loving it. So much so, that the first part of the book inspired my Medium article "Why You Should Stop Faking It." We hear a lot about the orgasm gap. Studies have reported men have nearly 2x the number of orgasms as women. There are lots of reasons for this gap, but what about pleasure …

Dr. B recently got me started listening to this podcast called “Pillow Talks” which is a sex therapist and her husband talking all things relationships and sex positivity. It's a great podcast, a little self-promotey, but the content is top notch, so muscle through. Or … pick up a copy of their book Sex Talks: The Five Conversations That Will Transform Your Love Life by Vanessa and Xander Marin at the bookstore or your local …

Come As You Are: The Surprising New Science That Will Transform Your Sex Life by Emily Nagoski, Ph.D is (or should be) a canonical book for vulva owners and anyone interested in pleasing a vulva. One of the things I mention a lot when I'm talking to people about sex positivity and romance is the dual control model of sexual response. It was first developed by Janssen and Boncroft at the Kinsey Institute in the …

I often talk about Shameless Sex by Amy Baldwin and April Lampert (the book and the podcast). Dr. B and I attended a live event with these two lovely people. It was a small group talking all things sex positivity including toys. There are so many options out there. If you've tried a toy and didn't like it, try something different. Vibrators or dildos (non-vibrating), toys for vulva owners and penis owners. Toys that are …

I love reading romance. And recently, I've grown to love writing it. I believe positive literature like romance can change the world. It reminds us we want and need to connect with others, we want to give and receive pleasure, and we want "good" to win, even if it's an anti-hero bad boy/girl. One key component of any steamy Christina Braver romance novel is great sex. Positive, exciting, fumbling, connecting, vulnerable, awesome sex. In order …