The Braver Blog

  • Who’s Afraid of Fellatio?

    One summer morning, I was on my deck sipping coffee and feverishly studying the book “Passionista: The Empowered Woman’s Guide to Pleasuring a Man” by Dr. Ian Kerner, researching for the novel I was writing. In my periphery, I heard an alarm. Not a rare occurrence in my close-knit neighborhood, but this one was unfamiliar (not a fire or car alarm). It was some distance away, so I didn’t get too concerned, but concentrated on Dr. Kerner’s book. After a few minutes of the incessant noise, my neighbor texted to ask me if heard it too. I told her yes… read more

  • Romance for Better Sex (2)

    In part one of this article, I mentioned how romance novels have evolved to be more diverse than the standard hero-on-a-horse/damsel-in-distress trope. Though we still love a good alpha male/ingenue story. “Fifty Shades of Grey” anyone? But modern romance novels are not all about alphas and ingenues. From including diverse characters to safe sex practices to confronting genuine issues with intimacy, these novels have become much more. There are best-sellers featuring same-sex couples, racial diversity, and neurodivergence just to name of few areas of growth. Everyone deserves to see themselves in the pages of a romance novel, and now more… read more

  • Romance for Better Sex (1)

    Yes, I believe reading romance novels can improve your sex life. But smart people don’t read romance. Orthose books are unrealistic or porn or fill-in-the-blank with whatever negative idea you’ve heard about the genre. Then keep reading because I have a point. Note: according to the Oxford Classic Dictionary, many scholars would argue that representing sexual activity, or obscenity in images or writing, does not necessarily make it pornography. Rather, it is defined as “material which presents people—particularly women—as mute, available, and subordinate sexual objects, often shown in a context of violence.” Romance is not porn. For years, some have… read more

  • A Day in the Life … 2/10/2026

    As someone with Generalized Anxiety Disorder (effectively managed with medication and hormone therapy for nearly a decade), the idea that I must be on social media to reach readers and sell books is daunting at times. I try to keep my feed to only books and positive vibes, but the other stuff sneaks in. Recently, I posed a question on Threads about a scene in Heated Rivalry that was a little … well … like non-consensual sex. I wanted to talk about it because I had written a similar scene in my book Formula One Noel that was male/female and… read more

  • Sex Scripts & Rollercoasters

    Sex scripts? A sex script is a plan or order for how you think sex is supposed to progress. I do this. He does that. We do this. Then I climax. Then he does. This is a pretty common sex script often reinforced in steamy romance novels. Many of us have sex scripts, partnered or not. And sometimes we can feel pressure to change them. The idea of a regular sex script can seem boring to some, like being in a rut. What used to be thrilling is now predictable. Maybe. But having a sex script we use over and… read more