During my research and planning for a book, I often read non-fiction and other books for additional resources and information in order to write from a position of familiarity, if not knowledge. I’m not a doctor or any kind of expert, but I want to present an authentic representation of subjects when I can. Below are some of the resources I’ve used to inform my writing. Many were available at the library. Check ‘em out!
Sex & Sexual Health
Some of these books lean toward heterosexual relationships as this is what I primarily write. I want to recognize that this content could be applied across the sex and sexuality spectrum.
- Kerner, Ian, She Comes First: The Thinking Man’s Guide to Pleasuring a Woman, Harper Collins Publishers, 2004.
- Sex instructions, oral sex, female orgasm, step-by-step techniques.
- Kerner, Ian, Passionista: The Empowered Woman’s Guide to Pleasuring a Man, William Morrow Paperbacks, 2008.
- Sex instructions, oral sex, male orgasm, step-by-step techniques
- Kerner, Ian, So Tell Me About the Last Time You Had Sex, Grand Central Publishing, 2021.
- Paget, Lou, How to Give Her Absolute Pleasure, Broadway Books, 2000.
- Techniques for manual and oral stimulation, penetration, and orgasm. Testimonials and real tips. Diagrams, toys, and resources.
- Nagoski, Emily, Come As You Are: Revised and Updated: The Surprising New Science That Will Transform Your Sex Life, Simon & Schuster; Updated edition, 2021.
- Empowering women to love their bodies and enjoy sex and sexuality
- Winks, Cathy, and Anne Semans, Good Vibrations Guide to Sex: The Most Complete Sex Manual Ever Written, Cleis Press, 2002.
- Moon, Allison, Getting It: A Guide to Hot, Healthy Hookups and Shame-Free Sex, Ten Speed Press, 2020.
- Dodson, Betty, Sex for One: The Joy of Selfloving, Harmony, 1996.
- Betty Dodson was arguably one of the most recognized experts in sex and sexuality for decades. Any of her books would likely be worth your time.
- Lehmiller, Justin J., Tell Me What You Want: The Science of Sexual Desire and How It Can Help You Improve Your Sex Life, De Capo Lifelong Books, 2018.
- Morin, Jack, The Erotic Mind, Harper Collins, 2012.
- Roberts, Matthais, Beyond Shame: Creating A Healthy Sex Life on Your Own Terms, Fortress Press, 2020.
Sex Later in Life
- Blank, Joani (Editor), Still Doing It: Women & Men Over 60 Write About Their Sexuality, Down There Press, 2000.
- Enlightening with contributor stories from many diverse backgrounds and experiences, all over the age of 60.
- Price, Joan, Better Than I Ever Expected: Straight Talk About Sex After Sixty, Seal Press, 2005.
- Warm, witty, and honest book about the challenges and delights of older-life sexuality. Input from interviews and real-life accounts.
I read many other books about this topic but found these to be the most relevant for my writing.
- Gregoire, Sheila Wray, Lindenbach, R. G., Sawatsky, J., The Great Sex Rescue: The Lies You’ve Been Taught and How to Recover What God Intended, Baker Books, 2021.
- Klein, Linda Kay, Pure: Inside the Evangelical Movement That Shamed a Generation of Young Women and How I Broke Free, Atria Books, 2018.
- Valenti, Jessica, The Purity Myth, Seal Press, 2009.
- Clark, Kristen, and Bethany Beal, Sex, Purity, and the Longings of a Girl’s Heart, Baker Books, 2019.
- McGregor, Alyson J., Sex Matters: How male-centric medicine endangers women’s health and what we can do about it, Quercus, 2020.
- Informative and well worth a read empowering woman to take better control of their health.
The Tech Industry
I worked in tech for 20 years, but these books were eye opening.
- Chang, Emily, Brotopia: Breaking Up the Boys’ Club of Silicon Valley, Penguin, 2019.
- A look behind the curtain in today’s male-dominated tech world and shocking true stories
- Garcia Martinez, Antonio, Chaos Monkeys: Obscene Fortune and Random Failure in Silicon Valley, Harper Paperbacks, 2018.
Food & Cooking
Mr. B is obsessed (in a good way) with Michael Pollan’s books and has had some influence.
- Pollan, Michael, The Botany of Desire: A Plant’s-Eye View of the World, Random House Trade Paperbacks, 2002.
- Pollan, Michael, The Omnivore’s Dilemma: A Natural History of Four Meals, Penguin, 2007.
- Pollan, Michael, Cooked: A Natural History of Transformation, Penguin Books, 2014.
- Thompson, Wright, Pappyland: A Story of Family, Fine Bourbon, and the Things That Last, Penguin Press, 2020.
- History of one of Bourbon’s best and most famous brands.
- Bourdain, Anthony, Kitchen Confidential, Bloomsbury Publishing PLC, 2013.
- Famed chef, gone too soon. Great insight into the realities of a professional kitchen.
- Azerrad, Michael, Our Band Could Be Your Life: Scenes from the American Indie Underground 1981-1991, Back Bay Books, 2002.
- A look at some great bands from my youth. How they got their start, and the sacrifices of too many bandmates living out of a van in order to play and progress the music they loved.
- Cain, Susan, Bitterweet: How Sorrow and Longing Make Us Whole, Random House Audio, 2022.
- Reeves, Richard V., Of Boys and Men: Why the Modern Male Is Struggling, Why It Matters, and What To Do About It, Brookings Institution Press, 2022.
- Stone, Geoffrey R., Sex and the Constitution: Sex, Religion, and the Law from America’s Origins to the Twenty-First Century, Liveright, 2017.
ON WRITING/CRAFT BOOKS & RESOURCES
- Brody, J., Save the Cat! Writes a Novel: The Last Book On Novel Writing You’ll Ever Need, Ten Speed Press, 2018.
- Browne, R. & D. King, Self-Editing for Fiction Writers: How to Edit Yourself Into Print, Harper Collins, 2004.
- Evans, D., Thinking Like a Romance Writer: The Sensual Writer’s Sourcebook of Words and Phrases, Satin Publishing, 2013.
- Hayes, G., Romancing the Beat: Story Structure for Romance Novels, 2016.
- Yardley, C., Rock Your Plot: A Simple System for Plotting Your Novel, 2012.
- writershelpingwriters.net – all kinds of thesauruses and tools. I have three of their books.
- wordhippo.com – great site to find the right word you are looking for.